My Cardboard Testimony

Our church recently made a video of some of our attenders sharing their "Cardboard Testimonies". What is that you ask? Basically, everyone is given a large piece of cardboard. They then describe in a short sentence or phrase a condition or situation in their life from which God rescued them or changed them. On the back side of the cardboard, the person writes how their life has been changed by God's grace. The video above is an example of another church doing the very same thing. Watch it. It's really amazing.

I had planned what I would write for my cardboard testimony, but I never got around to filming it for our video. (So, Scott, if you're reading this, I did get your email and planned to be there the 2nd day of filming, but Mommy was too pooped with Daddy being out of town for the third night in a row. Let's just say, the kids won that day!) So here's what I would have written:

Front: PEOPLE-PLEASER
Back: GOD-PLEASER

If there's one thing God has been teaching me, it's to focus on pleasing Him with the unique life He has given me. I used to think that a "good Christian girl" had to talk, walk and act a certain way (and had to go to a certain type of church!) because after all, wasn't everyone watching me and learning from me what a Christian is supposed to look like? How many of us who've grown up in church have heard the guilt-inducing question, "If you were put on trial for being a Christian, would you be convicted?" It was ideas like these that got me thinking in the wrong direction for many years in my life. I was actually more concerned about how my life appeared to others than how it really was in my heart, the part that only God sees. I was more concerned with fitting an imaginary mold than being the unique woman God intended for me to be.

I lived much of my life trying to look like the perfect, got-it-all-together, "good Christian girl", wanting to please all the people around me. One of the problems with the generic "good Christian girl" approach to life is that I became very legalistic in the way I viewed myself and my own behavior. It was all about doing the right things - not about being the right person. Naturally, I also projected my legalistic view of myself onto others, judging them unfairly. I found myself making choices out of sense of guilt, instead of a conviction of God's leading in my life. I also became afraid of stepping outside the imaginary mold, and therefore, I am sure I missed opportunities where God was calling me to fill a role He intended for me. I am confident that I am not alone in having lived much of my life with this flawed sense of self.

Through all of this I am learning that God created me as a unique individual with a specific purpose to be a part if His grace-filled plan for redeeming this imperfect world and all us within it. He did not create me and then assign me to simply fill a generic role. The legalistic, people-pleasing "good Christian girl" life is never what God intended for me. So, if I were put on trial for being a Christian, would I be convicted? I certainly hope so, but not because I follow a prescribed set of rules that anyone could keep, but because I hope to be seen as a woman after God's own heart. Out of a pure heart flow pure actions (it's never the other way around, as so many of us live it), and I need to be concerned with the condition of my heart - the part of me that only God truly sees.

How about you? You are a unique creation of God, too. God didn't design you to fill a generic mold. Are you living to please Him and fulfill His unique purpose for your life?

Everyday Ministry, Part 2

My friend, Chris, wrote the following comment in response to my previous post, "Everyday Ministry". His story really sums up my convictions of letting our everyday lives be a blessing to others simply by picking up our cross daily and following Jesus.

That's great J. So often I find myself wasting time trying to figure out "how" to be a blessing to those around me. Sometimes I succeed...other times I fail. But it's just being a Christian that can be the greatest blessing to others. Just showing Jesus out of the abundance of your heart is all it takes.

When we were in Florida I had started a prayer group that met on Mondays at 5am in my home. A shy older man was attending the prayer group. I tried to encourage him, also, in his singing and he had recently joined the worship team as a singer and was stepping out more and more in the church, i.e. getting involved in prayer groups and other things. He was a friend, but I wouldn't say we were terribly close. I did nothing other that what I felt God leading me to do.

We had a going away party shortly before we moved and this man was at the party. At the party he brought me off to the side and shared his thoughts with me. He said, "I want to thank you for being an example and encouragement to me and my family." He could tell I wasn't sure what he meant. He began to unfold a list of comments and encouragements I had made to him in the past several months that prompted him to get up off his seat and get involved. He said he had not been happier in a long time. I just wept.

I had asked him to start leading certain prayer sessions at my house, just praying out loud what God laid on his heart. At first he said he was nervous, but did it anyway. Two months ago I got a call from him; he was just calling to see how we were doing. He again thanked me for encouraging him to step out in prayer; even before we left I was speaking with him a lot about prayer, how to pray, what to pray and how to hear God's voice when praying. He told me during this phone call that he had since taken over the entire prayer team at our church and had even begun teaching and leading congregational prayer times on Wednesday nights!

As I'm sure you can understand, it's much more gratifying to see the house being built one brick at a time than to just come in and buy a house already built. It creates a greater sense of accomplishment and appreciation that just couldn't be there otherwise. It's even more special when God turns you around and shows you a house you didn't even realize you were building. Although seemingly mundane and sometimes unsatisfying to the "instant gratification", that's the paradox of "Everyday Ministry".

So keep pressing on to finish the race, and thanks for being a blessing to me.