Heart Transformation

Last night, our family attended our weekly small group meeting with our friends from our church. A small group is a group of 8-10 (or more or less) people who meet together usually in someone's home for the purpose of getting to know each other, forming meaningful friendships, and learning together how to follow Jesus. Let me just say, we really enjoy our small group! My husband and I have made new friends through our group, and our kids love playing with the other kids each week. I think both my husband and I would say we have been personally challenged through many of our small group discussions, as well as the examples of others in our group. Additionally, for me as a stay-at-home mom, it really is like a mid-week oasis, where I can be refreshed by filling up on adult conversation and fellowship while having a babysitter in charge of my kids for two hours!

Our discussion last night, led by my husband, who had prepared questions centered on the second half of James Chapter 2 - often thought of as the "Faith and Deeds" passage - really challenged me. James talks about how faith in Christ and living like Christ go hand in hand. You can't have one without the other. Christ IN you changes you, and your actions should follow. All of the discussion of good deeds (which certainly should accompany sincere faith in Christ) made me start to think how easily my mind and heart can become focused on my good deeds and no longer focused on Christ. How many times have I acted in a pure and kind way without a thought, only to later pollute it with pride by admiring myself for being so kind and thoughtful? What happened to Christlike humility? It's almost paradoxical: Christ's love in me compels me to act in a selfless way, but afterwards, my own pride regarding my good deed causes my innate self-centeredness to rear it's ugly head once again.

The truth is, it's so much easier to focus on my outward actions than my inner thoughts and attitudes. When I honestly examine my attitudes, I'm quickly reminded that I have no reason to be proud, but instead have a great need for heart transformation and mind renewal. John Ortberg, in his book The Life You've Always Wanted, asserts that this transformation that we all need to experience through Christ in our lives is literally a metamorphosis - becoming someone totally new. I am completely aware of my natural tendency to be self-centered, but I'm grateful that God continues to work on my heart and mind, slowly morphing me into someone who has a heart like His. I have a long way to go, but thankfully the Master artist never gives up on perfecting His work in me. I just need to get out of the way and let him do it.

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is -- his good, pleasing and perfect will."
--Romans 12:2